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  • Chelsea Hotel No. 2 recorded for YouTube!


    I’m still sick. I’m getting better, though!
    Sinus infection + multiple pulled intercostal muscles => clogged up and painful breathing. T_T

    Leonard Cohen’s Chelsea Hotel No. 2 is a song he wrote about his one night stand with Janis Joplin in the famous Chelsea Hotel. He later regretted penning the tune, but I am glad he did. It’s hard to make a one night stand poetic, and he did it well. The “No. 2″ means it was the second version of the song he wrote, performed, and recorded.

    This is my own version, so don’t be too offended if it’s not the same as the original.

    Chelsea Hotel # 2

    I remember you well in the Chelsea Hotel,
    you were talking so brave and so sweet,
    giving me head on the unmade bed,
    while the limousines wait in the street.

    Those were the reasons and that was New York,
    we were running for the money and the flesh.
    And that was called love for the workers in song
    probably still is for those of them left.

    Ah but you got away, didn’t you babe,
    you just turned your back on the crowd,
    you got away, I never once heard you say,
    I need you, I don’t need you,
    I need you, I don’t need you
    and all of that jiving around.

    I remember you well in the Chelsea Hotel
    you were famous, your heart was a legend.
    You told me again you preferred handsome men
    but for me you would make an exception.
    And clenching your fist for the ones like us
    who are oppressed by the figures of beauty,
    you fixed yourself, you said, “Well never mind,
    we are ugly but we have the music.”

    I can’t wait till I’m back up to 100% again.

    -bbbbbb.

  • Entitlement and other unrelated unrelentless babble.

    Some people act like they hopped right out of the womb complete with a well-developed sense of false self-importance and entitlement. Honestly, I don’t care… that is, until said people begin bothering me on a regular basis.

    Here is how it works: I don’t care if you feel like the world cannot function without you sharing your every opinion on every subject. The problem I have with you begins when you begin to feel obligated to share all of these opinions with me (and other people who complain to me) and then insist that you cannot be wrong even when you do not have any insight into most of the things you comment on to me. What grinds my gears even more is that I’m usually the one who actually has the experience and insight into the situation that is being so terribly distorted.

    Bottom line: it’s not cool to be stubborn about your absolutist statements (and you make way too many anyhow) when you have no idea what you’re talking about. I try hard to be nice and try to accommodate your self-centeredness, but it’s getting very difficult.
     
    Bottom edge of the bottom line: I suppose I can be more understanding and try to empathize with you, but you’re just so blatantly wrong…

    And I’m almost done figuring out my next two internships. I’ve been granted permission by the professionals I want to work with and I’m just working on finding time to go now. Hurrah.

    -bbbbbbbbbbbbawefhawiojawefawefrencahwefwaeochiwebbb.

  • I’ll Stay [Original] [Unfinished]

    Pause playlist on right before pressing play on the new original song!

    I’ve still got that bacterial sinus infection that didn’t get fixed from the first round of antibiotics. Hopefully this second round of meds (Avelox and Prednisone this time >.>) will knock out the infection and my cough. I’ve been coughing so much and so hard that I managed pull a couple of my intercostal muscles, decimating my ability to use breath support and sing out, so I apologize for the shakiness and breathiness. This song is a memoir of my foolish and more gullible days plus my current dislike of the cold weather in Texas. I am not done with it yet. I do not intend to leave it with only two verses and a chorus.

    I’ll Stay

    C E7 Am G
    V1:
    The burning cold weather, dry as ever,
    follows me as I walk
    The refreshing night air, sharp and cooling,
    accompanies my thoughts
    Why are we like this, fighting for days,
    in our own different ways?
    Maybe it’s just me, silly and foolish,
    and this is the price that I pay?

    V2:
    In the evening, it gets colder,
    I’m even more discouraged.
    The arctic conditions, the ice begins to glisten
    I’m wondering if you’re calm yet.
    Why are we like this, fighting for days,
    in our own different ways?
    Maybe it’s just me, silly and foolish,
    and this is the price that I pay?
    Maybe if it is, I’ll stay.

    F G Em Am
    Chorus:
    I’ll stay here and weather it,
    your cold uncaring looks.
    I’ll stay here and try to bear it,
    To see if it’ll do some good.
    You may leave if you want,
    You may leave if you want,
    You may leave if you want,
    I’ll stay.

    -bbbbbbawrhalefhalwifhasgjawj

    Oh yeah. I’m supposed to be reviewing for English right now.

  • Brit. Lit. Review.

    “It is not the object of this work to give a description of Derbyshire, nor of any of the remarkable places through which their route thither lay; Oxford, Blenheim, Warwick, Kenelworth, Birmingham, &c. are sufficiently known. A small part of Derbyshire is all the present concern. To the little town of Lambton, the scene of Mrs. Gardiner’s former residence, and where she had lately learned that some acquaintance still remained, they bent their steps, after having seen all the principal wonders of the country; and within five miles of Lambton, Elizabeth found from her aunt that Pemberley was situated. It was not in their direct road, nor more than a mile or two out of it. In talking over their route the evening before, Mrs. Gardiner expressed an inclination to see the place again. Mr. Gardiner declared his willingness, and Elizabeth was applied to for her approbation.”

    WHY DO YOU USE SO MANY COMMAS, JANE AUSTEN?

    I get ticked off when I read her writing because it feels like I’m battling my way up a river of maple syrup with a stale waffle paddle. 5:24 AM merits my breakfast food reference. I honestly cannot stand reading Pride and Prejudice, though–I literally read 50 pages and Sparknoted the rest because I didn’t think I needed to retain fluff that makes up 99.9% of the book anyhow. At least Thoreau makes a good point in his long drawn out arguments. P&P is just an exercise in monotony and futility for me while I sit here and prepare for an English exam, wondering why people even liked Jane Austen and Joseph Conrad.

    Aside from my complaint about style, I have to admit that I liked the plots. I suppose it’s something like this: I will force-feed myself a hard-to-read book if I think it is worth it, but at some point, the slow reading will merit my surrender.

    -b.

  • Oh, Beowulf.

    I have the multiple choice portion of my test over Beowulf today, and I have a few things to say about it.

    1. Why would you give a test during dead week!? Yes, it is referred to as dead week because no new material is introduced, and yes, a test is technically not new material, but COME ON. This is such a waste of time since we have to review more thoroughly over this book when we could be thoroughly reviewing the entire semester’s list of literary works. The whole semester’s worth of literary works that have been covered include long-winded narratives such as Pride and Prejudice and Heart Of Darkness–two works of literature that contain these small details that I am sure will come up on the exam.
    2. We haven’t even done much learning in Beowulf anyway! The packets we have gotten are almost all just fill in the blank reviews on plot and vague “why” questions that can’t be judged as right or wrong (unless, of course, the answer is something really irrelevant). Once in a while, we’ll turn our attention to the work’s pervasive use of kennings and alliteration, but it’s still nothing special.
    3. This is going to be part of the 100 question exam next week anyhow. We really don’t need a test over this. 
    4. One of my friends made a good observation when she pointed out that there is a lot of heavy foreshadowing of Dane betrayal that never comes to fruition in the work. I s’pose it’s just part of the historical context that is awkwardly woven into the epic hero’s tale.

    Of course, I’m just complaining because I am miserably Sparknoting the entire work to make sure I can recall it decently in my memory in six hours.

    -b.

  • 4. Kermit the Frog famously lamented it’s not easy being green. Do you agree?

         From  a literal standpoint, it is probably much easier for Kermit to be green than anyone else—mainly because the coat that Jim Henson’s mother threw into the trash bin that was to become our favorite ping pong ball eyed puppet was green tea green rather than blue, orange, or purple. For the purpose of this prompt, however, I prefer to see our favorite “Rainbow Connection” singing frog’s lamentation as a comment about his hardships in trying to join the environmental movement.

         And my answer is simple: being “green” is only hard if you never try it. Once you try it and get hooked, it’s the easiest thing to keep up.

         I have found, from personal experience, that to be “green”—that is to work toward environmental conservation and preservation—is more of a habit than a task. It is not a project that an individual can undertake on a free Saturday morning for a couple hours and consider done. I believe that turning and being “green” is a lifestyle change like dieting and exercise, except that instead of being recommended by a doctor or spouse, it is suggested by smoggy skies and parking lots full of litter.

         Like any lifestyle change, after coping with the initial resistance, it is not hard to start. After finding out how much sturdier reusable shopping bags are than the ubiquitous plastic junk given out in most supermarkets and trying them on for size, it’s easy to get hooked on the sturdy stylish shopping bags. And of course, once hooked on that fuzzy feeling inside that usually accompanies such humanitarianism, it’s easy to go from the “gateway” acts of “greenness” to harder acts, such as picking up other people’s empty bottles and cans that seem to be present in most city streets and parking lots.

         As a personal testament to the validity of my claims, I have now gotten to the point where if I spy a lonely looking aluminum can (or ten) on the side of the road while driving, I will actually park my car to go pick it/them up to recycle at home. While most people may sigh or chuckle at me for my being “green”, I believe it is only because they haven’t tried it for themselves: I’m sure they too would be addicted to the feel-good that comes with being “green” if they  would just give it a shot.

    Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight?

    -b.

  • Obligatory New Year’s Post

    This is just “for the record” so that I will be able to look back on this later on and see how I was doing at the outset of 2010–sort of a benchmark to see where I am. I really don’t have much to say about 2010 except for I hope this year sucks less than the last one and I hope I do well for myself.

    The Lowdown:
    Physically – doing well, need to dedicate more time
    Mentally – functioning decently
    Spiritually – comfortable with beliefs and values
    Organizationally – somewhat there, system is still in the works
    Academically – doing alright, could be better
    Personally – developing strong values and experimenting simultaneously, pushing boundaries
    Financially – working, making money, paying for things
    Musically – no more private lessons, but continuing piano, violin, guitar, voice work
    Procrastinationally – worse than ever, must fix that
    Wake up in the morning – only for shopping and fun stuff, need to wake up for school
    Relationships with women – single, sticking with high standards and low tolerance
    Future career – medical, no doubt
    Professionally – two internships down, two more to go.

    Big goal for 2010 (and the rest of my life?): work toward becoming a person that I can be proud of. I want to be able to live with myself and feel good about it. I can see a long road ahead of myself and I can see big changes about to happen. I can’t wait. At this point, it’s all up in the air for me.

    Happy New Year’s, everyone.

    -bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb.

  • I am ridiculous. Japanese Fashion Magazines.

    (4:22:17 PM) Bryan: i am ridiculous.
    (4:22:28 PM) Bryan: instead of writing my hopkins essay
    (4:22:36 PM) Bryan: i’m reading japanese fashion magazines online.
    (4:22:37 PM) Bryan: in japanese.
    (4:22:54 PM) Bryan: sounding out the words to figure out which links to click
    (4:23:06 PM) Bryan: “ai-te-mu” ITEM! “pu ran” PLAN!
    (4:24:14 PM) Bryan: “mo deh ru pu ro hu ee ru” MODEL PROFILE!

    -bbbbbbbbb.

  • Draft of Rice essay in progress!

     Yes, this is BS and yes, I admit it. I can’t believe I procrastinated every day for two weeks on starting such a simple essay on why my perspective is suitable for Rice.


        The experienced tightrope walker raises the heel of his right foot. In a smooth and graceful gesture with his head resting above his shoulders, his body propels itself forward with intent. One foot first. Then the other.  Beads of sweat are forming on his forehead. All the while, many different biomechanical physical principles are in effect. From the battle for equality between the tightrope walker’s gravitational force and collective tension and normal forces of the tightrope to his struggle for optimal mass distribution, the underlying unifying theme is harmony: only when equilibrium is maintained can he triumph. Both my professional and personal experiences with the resilience and fragility of life have given me valuable understanding and perspective on living that influences me to consciously strive for harmony.
        During the fall semester of my senior year, I spent an average of fifteen hours a week working two medical internships in the Presbyterian Hospital in Dallas, Texas. Over the course of the internships, I was exposed to a plethora of patients with a myriad of different illnesses and disorders, but I found myself most impacted by the amazing recoveries that I was able to follow.  For example, we once admitted a 44-year-old African American female patient transferred in from the Emergency Department with a blood glucose level of 1200 (the normal level is under 140). At the time of the admit, the patient was aphasic, or unable to speak, due to the high amounts of glucose in her blood altering her mental function. It seemed to me that the patient was in a very dire condition and not long for the world, but lo and behold, a mere twenty four hours later, I arrived at internship once again to observe the patient sitting upright and speaking coherently. With a little help from a lot of insulin, I watched human resilience give a grandmother of two adorable little girls back her ability to talk.
        Unfortunately, for every inspiring example of resilience I see, I am faced with a paralleling case of human fragility. From the medical standpoint that I developed, death is seen as an inevitable end to all life. Because it is unavoidable with a high volume of ill patients, those working in the medical field learn to see it objectively and not grow too attached to patients for fear of becoming distracted from the job. Having experienced the loss of four patients on the inpatient floor along with the loss of my father in 2007 and other recent tragedies involving the abrupt passing of fellow classmates, I feel that I have gained insight into the unstable state of human existence and understand loss from multiple points of view.
        Seeking harmony between the extreme resilience and fragility that accompany existence, I find comfort in doing all I can to help others. My extensive volunteer work with natural disaster relief, recycling, and nursing home care has been my most rewarding source of satisfaction. At the recycling plant that I volunteered at, we turned plastic water bottles into blankets and clothes for victims of disasters such as Hurricane Katrina and the Myanmar Tsunami. Whether fundraising for tsunami relief funds, sorting and processing bottles at a Taiwanese recycling plant, or clipping fingernails at the nursing home, I feel the most content when I am doing something to improve the welfare of others. I believe that there is no better way to pursue harmony than to work to better the world.
        Just as the seasoned tightrope walker uses his experienced judgment to calculate his every step before stepping with confidence on the thin line that delineates his success or failure, I use my constantly growing perspective to keep me on the right track to finding the right balance in life. I believe that it is this, my perspective of altruism and community service, that Rice University will find most valuable from me as a person.

    Yep. I have no idea what I’m doing. I guess I’ll take a nap and then wake up to do some more BSing and then get it proofread before submitting it. I sure hope Johns Hopkins isn’t asking for a superduperannoyinghardtowrite essay or anything, because I don’t know if I’ll have the brainpower left.

    -bbbbbbbbdamnthatprocrastinationawfwehalighalweghawiofj

  • Heh. I’m more connected than I thought.

    I have a lot more to do this break than I have been letting on. I realize that, aside from the little schoolwork and some of the college essay crap, a significant portion of my to-do list is made up of tasks relating to staying connected to important people. I actually did not realize this until one of my friends (bless her!) reminded me that I needed to make a call.

    List of some of the people I need to stay connected with:

    1. The wonderful physician who offered to mentor me in his clinic and on the inpatient floors that I used to intern on. I need to figure out specifics with him.
    2. The amazingly interesting, witty, humorous, and brilliant physician who is the Medical Director of the Senior Medical Center and Internal Medicine Clinic. I need to get him to speak for my school because we could use a perspective from a physician who is down-to-earth as well as talented.
    3. The super sharp and knowledgeable pharmacist who I did patient compliance statistics and started a database for. I need to call her to get in touch to get back into the clinic to do more patient compliance. Most people would get bored of reading through patient charts and checking for compliance and recording it, but I don’t know — I just love doing it so much. She answers all of my questions about anticoagulant therapy and the specifics of compliance with such ease — after all, it is her job.
    4. My high school counselor. I need to get my schedule cleared so that we can make sure I don’t end up having to take Psychology and all the other crap that’ll prevent me from getting to my potential new not school related  internships.

    I’m starting to see how important it is to be connected and know people and keep up with them in order to set things up for my future and get places. So apparently, it’s not only who you know, but also how much of an impression you make and how memorable you are to people that gets you places.

    I also want to find some of the residents that I was able to talk to about their experiences. A couple of them, I recall, never got to finish telling me their stories because of the distracting people in the clinic needing assistance (oh wait, patients, I mean!).

    And in other news, I really miss seeing some of the awesome nurses on the inpatient floors. Being around people for 3-8 hours a day for almost 20 weeks and then suddenly stopping is such a change to get used to.

    -bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbasdfawohfaglsiedkf